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25 Ways to Deal with Stress and
Anxiety
by Abdul Malik Mujahid
Stress is life. Stress is anything
that causes mental, physical, or spiritual tension.
There is no running away from it. All that matters is
how you deal with it. This article does not deal with
the factors of stress, anxiety, and depression, nor is
it a clinical advice. If you feel depressed, you are not
alone. It has been estimated that 75 to 90 percent of
all visits to primary care physicians in America are for
stress-related problems. This is why it is wise to
consult a doctor if you are having physical symptoms of
stress. However, here are some tips that can help from a
spiritual perspective. Please send us your feedback so
that we can improve this article Insha Allah.
Torture. Beatings. Loss of property. The
death of loved ones. These were just some of the
enormous challenges the Muslims of Makkah faced in the
seventh century following their acceptance of Islam in
fiercely tribal and polytheistic Makkah.
Detention. Harassment. Beatings. Discrimination. Loss
of Job. Profiling. Hate Crimes. Constant media
attention. Surveillance. These are just some of the
challenges Muslims in America today face, post-9/11.
Like our predecessors in Makkah, we have begun to face
great stress, anxiety, and pressure, more than ever in
our recent history on this continent, although Muslims
who were brought here as
slaves faced worse than what we can even imagine.
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Ask Him. He Listens: Dua
Turn each anxiety, each fear and each concern
into a Dua (supplication). Look at it as another
reason to submit to God and be in Sajdah
(prostration), during which you are closest to
Allah. God listens and already knows what is in your
heart, but He wants you to ask Him for what you
want. The Prophet said: Allah is angry with those
who do not ask Him for anything (Tirmidhi).
The Prophet once said that in prayer, he would
find rest and relief (Nasai). He would also
regularly ask for God’s forgiveness and remain in
prostration during prayer praising God (Tasbeeh) and
asking for His forgiveness (Bukhari).
Allah wants you to be specific. The Prophet
advised us to ask Allah for exactly what we want
instead of making vague Duas. Dua is the essence of
worship (the Prophet as quoted in Tirmidhi).
"Call on your Lord with humility and in private:
for Allah loveth not those who trespass beyond
bounds. Do not make mischief on the earth, after it
hath been set in order, but call on Him with fear.
And longing (in your hearts): for the mercy of Allah
is (always) near to those who do good" (Quran
7:55-56).
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Tie your Camel: Do your Part
One day Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be
upon him, noticed a Bedouin leaving his camel
without tying it. He asked the Bedouin, "Why don't
you tie down your camel?" The Bedouin answered, "I
put my trust in Allah." The Prophet then said, "Tie
your camel first, then put your trust in Allah" (Tirmidhi).
Muslims must never become fatalistic. Although we
know only Allah is in control and that He has
decreed all things, we are each responsible for
making the right choices and doing the right thing
in all situations of our lives. We must take action
(link to planning articles on SV). We must work to
alleviate the hardships we, our families and our
communities face.
Ask yourself the following questions if you are
worried about the state of the world: are you part
of the peace movement? Is your Masjid part of the
peace movement? Are you part of an interfaith group
with an agenda of peace and justice? Are you working
with a group fighting discrimination? If your answer
is no, it is time that you sat down to plan your
share of time and money in finding solutions to the
problems you face. "Verily Allah does not change
men’s condition unless they change their inner
selves" (Quran 13: 11).
Turn each worry into a Dua and each Dua into an
action plan. That will show your commitment to your
request and will focus your energy in the right
direction.
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Remember that human responsibility is limited
While we need to carry out our duty to the best
of our abilities, always remember that you don't
control the outcome of events. Even the Prophets did
not control the outcome of their efforts. Some were
successful, others were not. Once you have done your
duty, leave the results to Allah. Regardless of the
results of your efforts, you will be rewarded for
the part you have played.
However, never underestimate your abilities.
Understand the concept of Barakah (blessings from
Allah) and remember that Allah can and Insha Allah
will expand them if you are sincerely exerting your
energies for the right path.
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Leave the world behind you five times a day
Use the five daily prayers as a means to become
more Hereafter-oriented and less attached to this
temporary world. Start distancing yourself as soon
as you hear Adhan, the call to prayer. When you
perform Wudu, keep repeating Shahada, the
declaration of faith, as water drops slip down your
face, hands, arms, and hair. When you stand ready to
pray, mentally prepare yourself to leave this world
and all of its worries and stresses behind you.
Of course, Shaytan will try to distract you
during prayer. But whenever this happens, go back
and remember Allah. The more you return, the more
Allah will reward you for it. Also, make sure your
Sajdas (prostrations) are
talking Sajdas, in which you are really
connecting to God and seeking His Mercy, praising
Him, and asking His forgiveness.
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Seek help through Sabr
Seek help through Sabr and Salat (Quran 2:45).
This instruction from Allah provides us with two
critical tools that can ease our worries and pain.
Patience and prayer are two oft-neglected
stressbusters. Sabr is often translated as patience
but it is not just that. It includes self-control,
perseverance, endurance, and a focussed struggle to
achieve one’s goal. Unlike patience, which implies
resignation, the concept of Sabr includes a
duty to remain steadfast to achieve your goals
despite all odds.
Being patient gives us control in situations
where we feel we have little or no control. ‘We
cannot control what happens to us but we can control
our reaction to our circumstances’ is the mantra of
many modern-day self-help books. Patience helps us
keep our mind and attitude towards our difficulties
in check.
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Excuse Me! You are Not Running the World, He
is.
It is important to remind ourselves that we don’t
control all the variables in the world. God does. He
is the Wise, the All-Knowing. Sometimes our limited
human faculties are not able to comprehend His
wisdom behind what happens to us and to others, but
knowing that He is in control and that as human
beings we submit to His Will, enriches our humanity
and enhances our obedience (Uboodiah in Arabic)
towards him. Read the story of the encounter of
Moses with the mysteries behind God’s decision
(Quran: 18:60-82). Familiarize yourself with
God's 99 Names, which are also known as His
Attributes. It is a powerful way of knowing Him.
"God-there is no deity save Him, the Ever-Living,
the Self-Subsistent Fount of All being. Neither
slumber overtakes Him, nor sleep. His is all that is
in the heavens and all that is on earth. Who is
there that could intercede with Him, unless it be by
His leave? He knows all that lies open before men
and all that is hidden from them, whereas they
cannot attain to aught of His knowledge save that
which He wills them to attain. His eternal power
overspreads the heavens and the earth, and their
upholding wearies Him not. And He alone is truly
exalted, tremendous." (Quran 2:255).
The Prophet recommended reading this verse, known
as Ayat al kursi, after each prayer, Allah’s peace
and blessings be upon him. Once Ali, may Allah be
pleased with him, approached the Prophet during a
difficult time and he found the Prophet in Sajda,
where he kept repeating "Ya Hayy Ya Qayyum", words
which are part of this verse.
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Birds Don’t Carry their Food
Allah is al Razzaq (the Provider). "How many are
the creatures that carry not their own sustenance?
It is Allah Who feeds them and you, for He hears and
knows all things (Quran 29:60)." By reminding
yourself that He is the Provider, you will remember
that getting a job or providing for your family in
these economically and politically challenging
times, when Muslims are often the last to be hired
and the first to be fired, is in God’s Hands, not
yours. As Allah says in the Quran: "And He provides
for him from (sources) he never could imagine. And
if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is
(Allah) for him. For Allah will surely accomplish
His purpose. Verily, for all things has Allah
appointed a due proportion (Quran 65:3).
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God controls Life and Death
If you fear for your physical safety and
security, remember that only Allah gives life and
takes it back and, that He has appointed the time
for it. No one can harm you except if Allah wills.
As He says in the Quran: "Wherever you are, death
will find you out, even if you are in towers built
up strong and high!" (Quran 4:78).
9. Remember that life is short
It's easy to get caught up in our own stress and
anxiety. However, if we remember that our life is
short and temporary, and that the everlasting life
is in the Hereafter, this will put our worries in
perspective.
This belief in the transitory nature of the life
of this world reminds us that whatever difficulties,
trials, anxieties, and grief we suffer in this world
are, Insha Allah, something we will only experience
for a short period of time. And more importantly, if
we handle these tests with patience, Allah will
reward us for it.
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Do Zikr, Allah, Allah!
"… without doubt in the remembrance (Zikr) of
Allah do hearts find tranquility" (Quran 13:28).
If you commute, use your time in Zikr. Pick any
Tasbeeh and do that instead of listening to the
radio or reading the newspaper. Maybe you can divide
it up between Zikr and planning. Personally, I
recite the Tasbeeh of "Subhana Allahe wa be hamdihi,
subhan Allahil Azeem" 100 times as I drive. The
Prophet taught us these two short phrases which are
easy to say but will weigh heavy on our scale of
good deeds in the Hereafter.
When your heart feels heavy with stress or grief,
remember Allah and surround yourself with His Zikr.
Zikr refers to all forms of the remembrance of
Allah, including Salat, Tasbeeh, Tahmeed, Tahleel,
making supplication (Dua), and reading Quran.
"And your Lord says: ‘Call on Me; I will answer
your (prayer)…" (Quran 40:60)
By remembering Allah in the way He has taught us
to, we are more likely to gain acceptance of our
prayers and His Mercy in times of difficulty. We are
communicating with the only One Who not only Hears
and Knows all, but Who can change our situation and
give us the patience to deal with our difficulties.
"Remember Me, and I shall remember you; be
grateful to Me, and deny Me not" (Quran 2:152).
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Relying on Allah:
Tawakkul
When you awaken in the morning, thank Allah for
giving you life after that short death called sleep.
When you step out of your home, say 'in Your Name
Allah, I put my trust in Allah, and there is no
power or force except with Allah' (Bismillahi
Tawakal to al Allah wa la hawla wa la quwwata illa
billah). At night, remember Allah, with His praises
on your lips.
Once you have established a plan you intend to
follow through on to deal with a specific issue or
problem in your life, put your trust in the most
Wise and the All-Knowing. "When you have taken a
decision, put your trust in Allah" (Quran 3: 159).
Rely on Allah by constantly remembering Him
throughout your day. When you lay down to sleep,
remember that sleep is death. That is why one of the
recommended supplications before going to sleep is
"with Your (Allah's) Name I die and become alive".
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Connect with other human beings
You are not alone. Muslims are not alone. We are
not suffering in silence. There are millions of good
people who are not Muslim with beautiful hearts and
minds. These are people who have supported us,
individually and collectively, post-9/11, by
checking up on us and making sure we are safe. These
are individuals and organizations who have spoken up
in defense of Muslims as we endured harassment and
discrimination.
We must think of them, talk to them, connect with
them, and pray for them. Through our connections, we
will break the chain of isolation that leads to
depression and anxiety.
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Compare your dining table with that of those
who don't have as much as you do
The Prophet said: Whenever you see someone better
than you in wealth, face or figure, you should look
at someone who is inferior to you in these respects
(so that you may thank Allah for His blessings) (Bukhari,
Muslim).
Next time you sit down to eat, eye the table
carefully. Check out the selection of food, the
quality, the taste, the quantity, and then think of
the millions of others who don't have even half as
much. The Prophet's Hadith reminds us of this so
that we can appreciate and thank God for all that we
have.
Also remember that the Prophet only encouraged us
to compare ourselves to others in two respects: in
our Islamic knowledge and level of belief in God (Deen).
In these two areas, we should compare ourselves with
those who have more than what we do.
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Say it Loud: Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar:
Takbirat & Adhan
Find a corner of a lake, go out in the
wilderness, or even stand on your lawn at your home
and call the Adhan with your heart. While driving,
instead of listening to the same news over and over
again, say Allahu Akbar as loudly as you can or as
softly as you want, based on your mood. Year ago, I
remember calling Adhan on a Lake Michigan shore in
Chicago after sunset as the water gushed against my
knees. I was calling it for myself. There was no one
else accept the waves after waves of water with
their symphony. It was relaxing and meaningful.
Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar.
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Pray in congregation (Jamat)
Pray with other people instead of alone. If you
can't pray all five prayers in congregation, at
least find one or two prayers you can pray with
others. If you are away, establish Jamat in your own
family. During the Prophet's time, even though the
Muslims endured great persecution, including
physical beatings, they would sometimes meet on the
side of a mountain or valley and tried to pray
together. This is a great morale booster.
16. How is your Imam's Dua?
Does the Imam at your local mosque make Dua
silently or out loud? Ask him to supplicate with the
whole congregation. Suggest Duas for him to make.
Ask him to make Dua for other people.
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Work for the Unity of Muslims
Bringing Muslims together will not only help the
Muslims, but it will also encourage you to focus
your energies on something constructive versus
zeroing in on and consistently fretting about
difficulties you are going through.
Invite Muslims from other ethnic groups to your
functions. Visit Masjids other than yours in your
city. When you meet a Muslim leader, after thanking
him for his efforts, ask him what he is doing for
Muslim unity. Ask Imams to make Dua for this. These
are just small ways you can help yourself and the
Muslim community.
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Sleep the way the Prophet slept
End your day on a positive note. Make Wudu, then
think of your day. Thank Allah for all the good
things you accomplished, like Zikr and Salat. Ask
yourself what you did today to bring humanity
together and what you did to help Muslims become
servants of humanity. For everything positive, say
Alhamdu lillah (Praise be to Allah). For everything
negative say Astaghfirullah wa atoobo ilayk (I seek
Allah's forgiveness and I turn to You [Allah]).
Recite the last two chapters of the Quran, thinking
and praying as you turn on your right side with your
hand below your right cheek, the way the Prophet
used to sleep. Then close your day with the name of
Allah on your tongue. Insha Allah, you will have a
good, restful night.
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Begin the Day on a Positive Note
Get up early. Get up thanking God that He has
given you another day. Alhamdu lillahil lazi ahyana
bada ma amatana, wa ilaihin Nushoor (Praise be to
Allah Who gave us life after death and unto Him will
be the return). Invest in an audio tape driven alarm
clock so you can get up to the melody of the Quran.
Or Let
Dawud Wharnsby's joyful notes put you in a good
mood. Sing along if you like. Develop your to do
list for the day if you didn't do it the night
before. Begin with the name of Allah, with Whose
name nothing in the heavens or the earth can hurt
you. He is the Highest and the Greatest. (Bismillahillazi
la yazurru maa ismihi shaiun fil arze wa la fis
samae, wahuwal Alee ul Azeem). The Prophet used to
say this after every Fajr and Maghrib prayers.
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Avoid Media Overexposure: Switch from News to
Books
Don't spend too much time checking out the news
on the radio, television or internet. Spend more
time reading good books and journals. When you
listen to the persistent barrage of bad news,
especially relating to Muslims nowadays, you feel
not only depressed, but powerless. Cut down media
time to reduce your stress and anxiety. It's
important to know what's going on but not to an
extent that it ruins your day or your mood.
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Pray for Others to Heal Yourself.
The Prophet was always concerned about other
people, Muslims and non-Muslims, and would regularly
pray for them. Praying for others connects you with
them and helps you understand their suffering. This
in itself has a healing component to it. The Prophet
has said that praying for someone who is not present
increases love.
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Make the Quran your Partner
Reading and listening to the Quran will help
refresh our hearts and our minds. Recite it out loud
or in a low voice. Listen to it in the car. When you
are praying Nafl or extra prayers, pick it up and
use it to recite portions of the Quran you are not
as familiar with. Connecting to the Quran means
connecting to God. Let it be a means to heal your
heart of stress and worries. Invest in different
recordings of the Quran and their translations.
"O humanity! There has come to you a direction
from your Lord and a cure for all [the ills] in
men’s hearts - and for those who believe, a Guidance
and a Mercy" (Quran 10:57).
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Be thankful to Allah
"If you are grateful, I will give you more"
(Quran 14:7).
Counting our blessings helps us not only be
grateful for what we have, but it also reminds us
that we are so much better off than millions of
others, whether that is in terms of our health,
family, financial situation, or other aspects of our
life. And being grateful for all we have helps us
maintain a positive attitude in the face of worries
and challenges we are facing almost daily.
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Ideals: One step at a time
Ideals are wonderful things to pursue. But do
that gradually. Think, prioritize, plan, and move
forward. One step at a time.
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Efforts not Results Count in the Eyes of Allah
Our success depends on our sincere efforts to the
best of our abilities. It is the mercy of Allah that
He does not demand results, Alhamdu lillah. He is
happy if He finds us making our best sincere effort.
Thank you Allah!
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