AL-HUDA
Foundation, NJ U. S. A
the Message Continues ... 11/84
Article 1 - Article 2 - Article 3 - Article 4 - Article 5 - Article 6 - Article 7 - Article 8 - Article 9 - Article 10 - Article 11 - Article 12
Trying to be something we are not!
by Yasmeen Mugahed
'Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade myself by
trying to be something I'm not -- and in all honesty --
don't want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach
true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and
value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness.
On March 18, 2005 Amina Wadud led the first female-led
Jumah (Friday) prayer. On that day women took a huge
step towards being more like men. But, did we come
closer to actualizing our God given liberation? I Don’t
think so.
What we so often forget is that God has honoured the
woman by giving her value in relation to God not in
relation to men. But as western feminism erases God from
the scene, there are no standard left but men. As a
result the western feminist is forced to find her value
in relation to a man. And in so doing she has accepted a
faulty assumption. She has accepted that man is the
standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human
being until
she becomes
just like a man - the standard. When
a man cut his hair short, she wanted to cut her hair
short. When a man joined the army, she wanted to join
the army. She wanted these things for no other reason
than because the 'standard' had it. What she didn't
recognize was that God dignifies both men and women in
their distinctiveness—not their sameness. And on March
18, Muslim women made the very same mistake. For
1400 years there has been a consensus of the scholars
that men are to lead prayer. As a Muslim woman, why does
this matter? The one who leads prayer is not spiritually
superior in any way. Something is not better just
because a man does it. And leading prayer is not better,
just because it's leading. Had it been the role of women
or had it been more divine, why wouldn't the Prophet
have asked Bibi Khadija (as), or Bibi Fatima (as), the
greatest women of all time to lead? These
women were promised heaven and yet they never lead
prayer (in the congregation of men. Women can lead
prayers in the congregation of women). But
now for the first time in 1400 years, we look at a man
leading prayer and we think, 'That's not fair.' We think
so although God has given no special privilege to the
one who leads. The imam (of Jama’ah) is no higher in the
eyes of God than the one who prays behind. On
the other hand, only a woman can be a mother. And Allah
(swt) has given special privilege to a mother. The
Prophet (saww) taught us that heaven lies at the feet of
mothers. But no matter what a man does he can never be a
mother. So why is that not unfair? When
asked who is most deserving of our kind treatment? The
Prophet replied 'your mother' three times before saying
'your father' only once. Isn't
that sexist? No matter what a man does he will never be
able to have the status of a mother. And
yet even when Allah (swt) honors us with something
uniquely feminine, we are too busy trying to find our
worth in reference to men, to value it or even notice.
We too have accepted men as the standard; so anything
uniquely feminine is, by definition, inferior. Being
sensitive is an insult, becoming a mother, degradation. In
the battle between stoic rationality (considered
masculine) and self-less compassion (considered
feminine), rationality reigns supreme. As
soon as we accept that everything a man has and does is
better, all that follows is just a knee jerk reaction:
if men have it, we want it too. If men pray in the front
rows, we assume this is better, so we want to pray in
the front rows too. If men lead prayer, we assume the
imam is closer to Allah (swt), so we want to lead prayer
too. Somewhere along the line we've accepted the notion
that having a position of Worldly leadership is some
indication of one's position with God. A
Muslim woman does not need to degrade herself in this
way. She has God as a standard. She has God to give her
value; she doesn't need a man. In
fact, in our crusade to follow men, we, as women, never
even stopped to examine the possibility that what we
have is better for us. In some cases we even gave up
what was higher only to be like men. Fifty
years ago, society told us that men were superior
because they left the home to work in factories. We were
mothers. And yet, we were told that it was women's
liberation to abandon the raising of another human being
in order to work on a machine. We accepted that working
in a factory was superior to raising the Foundation of
society, just because a man did it. Then
after working, we were expected to be superhuman - the
perfect mother, the perfect wife, the perfect homemaker
- and have the perfect career. And while there is
nothing wrong, by definition, with a woman having a
career, we soon came to realize what we had sacrificed
by blindly mimicking men. We watched as our children
became strangers and soon recognized the privilege we'd
given up. And
so only now - given the choice - women in the West are
choosing to stay home to raise their children.
According to the United States Department of
Agriculture, only 31 percent of mothers with babies, and
18 percent of mothers with two or more children, are
working full-time. And of those working mothers, a
survey conducted by Parenting Magazine in 2000, found
that 93% of them say they would rather be home with
their kids, but are compelled to work due to 'financial
obligations' It
took women in the West almost a century of
experimentation to realize a privilege given to Muslim
women 1400 years ago. Given
my privilege as a woman, I only degrade myself by trying
to be something I'm not -- and in all honesty -- don't
want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true
liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value
the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness. If
given a choice between stoic justice and compassion, I
choose compassion. And if given a choice between worldly
leadership and heaven at my feet (as a mother) - I
choose Heaven. |
|
HOME - NEWSLETTERS - BOOKS - ARTICLES - CONTACT - FEEDBACK
DISCLAIMER:
All material published by Al-Huda.com / And the Message Continues is the sole responsibility of its author's).
The opinions and/or assertions contained therein do not necessarily reflect the editorial views of this site,
nor of Al-Huda and its officers.